Nobody understands.. You honestly think you want to know me but you don’t. When everything just rush’s to your head at once, just thinking if you die, if anybody would even notice your gone. Or would anybody even care? Those nights where everyone and everything that someone gets to you it makes you wanna cry. Even dropping your pin makes you just wanna freak out, drop down and cry yourself to sleep. Nobody understands how bad you actually hurt inside. Could you not tell? I cried on the phone when you told me those hurtful shit over the phone? Did you not notice how you actually broke my heart? But you’re not the only one. I’m use to it. The pain, suffering, anxiety.. I deal with it. And try to cover it with a smile But you know, sometimes it’s hard when you can’t even trust or talk to anyone without being scared or being judged of how much of a pussy you sound. When you just wish someone will call you or hug you and telling you everything is going to be okay and hold you in your arms. But I can’t, why? Because everyone I get close too always disappears so I have no other way but to keep pushing them away. So all you know how to do is cry yourself to sleep and get over it, cause nobody else can help you, but the worthless piece of crap yourself.
(Source: vodka-cherries)
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